Viewers of “Seinfeld” reruns today — and those who watched each new episode as it came out — are in a unique position. The show, which premiered in 1989 and ran through 1998, contains some storylines that many people in 2018 would consider highly controversial and/or politically incorrect.
Chances are good that some or all of these “Seinfeld” episodes would not make it through production if they were suggested today.
Jerry Seinfeld, the show’s star and namesake, has gone on record as saying he’s opposed to adhering to political correctness in comedy. Unfortunately, in today’s world, everyone is offended by everything — which makes for boring TV comedy, for sure.
Luckily, “Seinfeld” still airs repeat episodes on a regular basis — and has a crazy-large cult following.
LifeZette selected 17 episodes that almost surely wouldn’t be written or aired today out of fear of attacks from liberal snowflakes and left-wing culture hawks.
“The Café” — Season 3
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A Pakistani immigrant named Babu opens up a failing café across from Jerry’s apartment. The comedian decides to advise the owner to bring in different cuisines — and make the restaurant Pakistani-themed. As a result, the café does even worse. The kicker is that later in the series, Babu is deported because he doesn’t renew his immigration papers. Today, illegal immigration is nothing to joke about, certainly.
“The Note” — Season 3
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When George Costanza gets a massage, he becomes extremely uncomfortable when he learns his therapist is a man. Afterward, he tells Jerry he thinks “it moved” during the massage and actually starts to have doubts about his sexual orientation. He believes “movement” in the presence of another man means he’s failed the “gay test.”
“The Nose Job” — Season 3
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George can’t help staring at the unusually large nose of the woman he’s dating, so he makes a “nonchalant” attempt to hint at plastic surgery. But he can’t get past her nose, so she breaks up with him. He loses the girl — and to put salt on the wound, she ends up getting her nose fixed and dating Kramer. (These were the days when personality didn’t matter.)
“The Outing” — Season 4
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When an NYU reporter erroneously outs Jerry as gay and George as his intimate and longtime companion, Jerry spends the rest of the episode going to extreme lengths to prove he’s straight. “Not that there’s anything wrong with” being gay, he says — which is still recalled today.
“The Implant” — Season 4
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When Jerry starts dating a woman from his gym, Elaine tells him the woman has fake breasts. Jerry dumps the girlfriend because of her supposed plastic surgery — only to find out Elaine now thinks she’s wrong and that the woman’s cleavage is real. Jerry decides to take her back — only to be dumped himself when the woman finds out about his schemes. “They’re real, and they’re spectacular!” she (played by Teri Hatcher) says in triumph.
“The Handicap Spot” — Season 4
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George persuades Kramer to park in a spot for those who are handicapped, but a disabled woman is injured as a result of the illegal move. Kramer assumes handicapped people don’t drive — “if they could drive, then they wouldn’t be a handicap.” Elaine asks, “If you can drive, you aren’t handicapped?” Kramer responds, “Handicapped people want to be treated like everybody else” — and George supports the argument, affirming feminists are the same way. (Whoa!)
“The Shoes” — Season 4
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George is caught gawking at the breasts of his boss’s 15-year-old daughter — which Jerry rips him about. “Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun: You don’t stare at it. It’s too risky. You get a sense of it and then you look away!” To get George off the hook, the gang works up a scenario for Elaine to show off her cleavage in front of the boss to prove a point — that all straight men are helpless in this instance.
“The Cigar Store Indian” — Season 5
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Elaine’s friend, Winona, thinks Jerry is “racially insensitive” when he gives Elaine a cigar-store Indian statue as a peace offering while making “hooting” noises. He somehow gets her to go on a date in order to make up for his racist gestures — but inadvertently calls her an “Indian giver.”
“The Beard” — Season 6
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Elaine pretends to be the girlfriend of a gay man in order to appease his homophobic boss. She has a great time with the guy on their date — and sets out to change his sexual preference. The LGBT community would have a field day today with the idea of Elaine’s attempting to get a guy to “change teams.”
“The Diplomat’s Club” — Season 6
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George offends his black boss by telling him he looks like Sugar Ray Leonard, then goes out of his way to prove he is not racist by trying to find a black man who will pretend to be his friend. George even brings Jerry’s one-time exterminator to dinner to meet the boss. Can you imagine the uproar that would ensue if this were to air as a new episode today?
“The Chinese Woman” — Season 6
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George’s phone lines are crossed with a woman Jerry thinks is Chinese — her name, after all, is Donna Chang (and in “Seinfeld” world, that’s enough proof). He tells Elaine he should’ve talked to her because he likes Asian women — which she views as racist. Jerry asks, “How can it be racist if I like their race?” The woman turns out to be a white woman, and Jerry begins dating her — because, at the end of the day, she’s still a woman.
“The Switch” — Season 6
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As George brags about his new girlfriend, a model, he mentions she eats like there’s no tomorrow — so Kramer suggests she’s bulimic. George fuels Kramer’s suggestion by confirming that she does go to the ladies room after every meal. George begins thinking she’s “refunding” or “throwing money down the toilet” — but he needs proof. George asks Kramer’s mother (a bathroom matron) to spy on the woman and when she doesn’t show, he winds up walking into the bathroom to find the model brushing her hair. Awkward!
“The Jimmy” — Season 6
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After the guys of “Seinfeld” finish up a basketball game with a man named Jimmy — who always refers to himself in the third person — they become intrigued with his special training shoes. Due to the new shoes, Kramer is mistaken for a mentally challenged person — and the novocaine from a dental visit that won’t wear off doesn’t help, either. Kramer drools all over the floor and speaks awkwardly (still wearing the silly looking shoes) — which is why he’s mistaken for an “able, mentally challenged adult.”
“The Checks” — Season 8
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Jerry does a bit for a Japanese TV program and as a result receives hundreds of royalty checks — worth 12 cents each. Kramer makes Japanese friends on the street and decides to host them in his new dresser drawers. (Need we say more?)
“The Merv Griffin Show” — Season 9
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Jerry, George and Elaine take turns “drugging” Jerry’s girlfriend just for a chance to play with her vintage toy collection. The entire episode makes plays about “date rape.” The idea of drugging a person you’re dating to get access to some of that person’s possessions … hmm. Not much of a crowd pleaser.
“The Wizard” — Season 9
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Jerry and George mess with Elaine by debating the race of her new boyfriend. Turns out her boyfriend is not black — and that he actually refers to them (Elaine and himself) as an interracial couple because he thinks Elaine is Hispanic. Just because someone “looks” Hispanic or black doesn’t mean it’s OK to make assumptions … right?
“The Puerto Rican Day Parade” — Season 9
Nobody likes a traffic jam — but for the “Seinfeld” gang, it triggers chaos. This is the episode in which Kramer stomps on a burning Puerto Rican flag. It caused controversy in 1998 when it first aired and it would definitely cause controversy now. The show pushed the limits even further when Kramer shouted, “It’s like this every day in Puerto Rico!” as he’s chased by an angry mob.